We went to the library this morning, in search of inspiration for BK1's poetry "assignment". In the wake of her Mysterios Poem, her teacher has asked her to write a poem on the Queen's Jubilee, and send it to the Queen. Hardly inspirational, less than Roald Dahl in any case...
Anyway, here we are in the library. A mum is telling her friend she is invited to a wedding this evening.
When was the last time I attended a wedding? My neighbour's in Algeria, two years ago.
A realisation dawns on me: My children will probably never take part in adult celebrations in the UK. We have no family here; the only celebrations we get invited to are children's birthdays.
I have vivid memories of weddings, circumcision parties, diploma celebrations and the like in my childhood: games, lamb couscous, baklava and qnidlat, traditional costumes and dresses, gold and silver jewellery, music and zerna, dancing, family crises, gossip, cousins, friendships...
My daughters are missing out on this part of culture, because neither of BabelDad nor me are home.
I wonder how this will impact on their perceptions of fun and sense of belonging somewhere. Where will home be for them?
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Your last question is one I ask myself all the time for my little one too. Hopefully she will figure it out herself as I don't think i can do it....
ReplyDeleteWill she feel like she doesn't belong anywhere? Or will she feel at home everywhere?
Hard question to ask, and harder even to reply to. Glad to see we share the same soul-searching question Annabelle.
DeleteIt's hard - sorry you are having a tough day.
ReplyDeleteAnd they will go to the celebrations, they will just be different.
And their childhood memories will still be their childhood memories, even if they are different from yours. The big things are undoubtedly important, but it is the day to day stuff that really shapes us.
I've lived in so many countries that I don't feel a strong affinity for any in particular.
I love where we live now, but also love things about other countries that we visit. I don't feel my nationality is important, and it doesn't really shape who I am.
I am content and comfortable 'fitting in', and feel a sense of strength and pride at my willingness to live different places.
I hope that is how my girls will grow up, and I am sure you kids will turn out just fine too.
Thank you Fiona for your comforting words. It is good to have your insight as someone who has been travelling around since a young age, and who does not have a classical definition of home. Thank you again, it means a lot to me.
DeleteSorry you are having a homesick day. Hope it passes soon.
ReplyDeleteSuch a dilemma! I too wonder what my children's memories will be, they are so different than mine.
Yes Peeogyo, I can imagine how Your Canadian childhood memories can differ from your own children's Japanese ones. I once spent 10 days in Japan; never in my life had I felt so alien to a place, and I have travelled my fair share.
DeleteHard not to compare one's childhood with that of our children.